Discovering Yourself and Live With It! (Part 4)

Discovering My True Love
I am sure many of us know how gays get to know each other. Some of us know each other from chatrooms, pubs, massage centers, gyms, being friend's friend etc. It is undeniable most chatrooms nowadays have become sex rooms, most people (can say 85%) there are looking for sex. Sometimes it keeps me wondering are there so many desperate for sex?

Well, in a recent studies, it was acknowledged that gay men had more sexual desire than the straight ones, mainly because of our hormone. Well, I totally agree with this report.

I did logon to the chatroom all the time, normally just "parking" there. On 24 Sept 2002 (I still remember this date), someone privated me. We chatted for almost 2 hours, and then we exchanged phone numbers and e-mails. I just thought we may be good friends, as he's Thai, and stayed in Bangkok. We continued to contact each other as good friends for 2 months plus, and then one fine day I decided to meet him in Bangkok, as I was on transit to Cambodia for holiday. Before that we never exchange our photos before.

I still remember the place we met was in McDonald Central Lad Phrao. We had a chat before I need to rush to meet my straight friends in other parts of Bangkok. And I realised that I have fall in love with him.

Yes, we loved each other very much. For the past few years, we were separated by distance. We managed to meet few times a year. Most of my friends said that I was crazy and looking for disaster. There would be no good ending for us.

At first, I have doubts. I have so many fears in my mind. But I know to ensure our relationship works, we must have faith to each other. It's TRUST.

However, I dared to say that our relationship lasted until now. Coming this Dec, we will be celebrating 4th anniversary as love partner (although there was a break-up in between).

I love him. Because I can feel that he is the only one who really understand me. I don't care how seldom we meet as long as we know that we love each other. He loves me for who I am.

Whenever we have problems, we always open up for discussion. Many people just try to ignore. Why not talk about it? Why are we so afraid to admit if it's our fault? Isn't it good when someone can prove that you are wrong, and you realised it and improve further?

Is arguement bad for relationship? To me, it's NOT. Arguement occurs when we have different in expectation. Arguement (if you look in a positive way) brings couples closer. At the end of the arguement, compromise and reach a consensus. It's an effective way to understand each other more.

Why we need to see everyday? Is distance a main issue? Are we far away?

Well, actually we are looking at the same moon and stars every night. Ha Ha Ha.

I have promised him no matter what will happen in future, he always have a place in my heart.

I love you, Art. I know I always do.